Sunday, 27 May 2012

In the clouds

Image by me

As a perceptive person I can tend to take on moods of others too easily. It bothers me, I hate it. I try my hardest to side step bad moods radiating from people around me however in the past I have found it hard to ignore them. I am not sure why others’ moods affect me so much, I have often wondered why I let them. I think it may have something to do with wanting everyone around me to be happy. And perhaps I am sensitive by nature.

It’s a fact that we create our own environment. Think negative and you’ll feel negative. It's disconcerting how much of an impact a person’s demeanour can have on those around them. Put one negative character in a group of people and watch their negativity spread to another. This is how gossip and negative banter ensues, one person starts and others jump in. It’s a vicious cycle and one I try very hard to steer away from. It’s not always easy though.

I try very hard to teach my son to see the bright side of all situations.  Sometimes letting him acknowledge something isn’t fun or happy is essential though, life won’t always sprout daisies and sunshine. The reality is there are situations that make us sad, or situations we cannot avoid or alter. Accepting that is part of life, and I think will only reduce the expectation that every minute has to be amazing. However when it comes to being positive I am a huge advocate of glass half full. If I can see light in a tough situation I will focus on that rather than the darkness. I try to instill this approach in my son.

Negativity is destructive. It sucks good energy and takes up space where creativity and joy should live. Negativity breeds negativity, it manifests in all other areas of our lives if we feed it and allow it to reside in our day. I believe it is a trait of a limited mind. While one is wasting time focusing on being negative they are missing out on all that is wondrous around them. Wouldn’t it be much more enjoyable to seek out the positive and focus on that? I think so. Quite simply a smile feels more joyous than a frown.

So how do we avoid negativity and not let it impact on us? I have worked hard on this for a few years now and I feel I am getting quite constructive at managing negativity around me. Essentially what I remember is this: I cannot control how those around me act, however how I react is totally in my control. Not reacting, rather responding, to negative people is the key for me. In the first instance I will always avoid. I am not one for sweeping issues aside and much prefer to resolve problems, but I am all for avoiding negativity. It’s destructive in my opinion and serves me absolutely no purpose. My creative soul loathes it. I run a mile. But if I cannot avoid it and it surrounds me, I don’t react. I smile, I offer constructive solutions (if the negativity is a result of an issue) and I simply avoid taking on the emotions attached and focus on the facts. It sounds easy in theory and has taken a lot of practice on my part, but I can gladly say I have become quite the master at avoiding negativity.

Back to head up in the clouds for me. The world looks amazing from up here.


  1. Peggy this post was made for me. Lately my husband has been going through a bit of a rough time. I'm trying to be supportive & be what he needs but his constant flat mood has dragged me down. I've been fighting to come back up, to reach the light that I know is waiting but it's hard when his grey cloud is hovering. It is hard to not take on those closest to you moods. It's hard to not get pulled in & pulled down. I'll keep trying to stay in the light & pull him too...

    1. Reannon I feel for you, I truly do. It's so hard when your loved ones are down, much easier to avoid the flat moods when they belong to others you can avoid and are not close to. But much harder when it's your partner.

      Sometimes the best we can do is let the other person know we are there. An arm around their shoulder and some kind words might be all he needs. Some things cannot be solved by others and he might need to just work through it himself. Let him have his mood, let him know you're there and try your hardest to not get pulled down. I feel for you as I would struggle terribly with this myself. Sending you some light Reannon. xo

  2. This is a great post. I am very sensitive to other people. If my husband seems down, i feel very flat, but I am learning that his down is just his melancholy way and he actually still happy. His happy and my happy appear to be two different things. I am learning to just be me happy. Thank you for this piece it has struck a cord with me. Elizabeth from thedotdotblog

    1. Thanks for stopping by Elizabeth. That's exactly what I've been trying to do, not tune into others' moods and let them have their moods. I, like you, want everyone to be happy all the time like I think I am, but not everyone is like me I guess. And you're right, someone else's happy isn't necessarily my happy. Being sensitive isn't always a good thing but we can learn to not take on all things around us. Good luck Elizabeth. :)

  3. Beautiful picture, Peggy.

    You know what I'm going to say... I say it so often that I even bore myself.


    It changes the neurons, I'm telling you. x

    1. Thanks Bron, taken one lovely day at the beach. :)

      I'm with you on gratefulness, it does change the neurons. Love it!

      Also, love to see you round these parts, thanks for stopping by. xo

  4. Chic an dstylish! follow each other darling? Kisses


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