I am grateful for...the messy one.

What is it about my husband that makes him ‘the one’? Off the top of my head his enormously generous nature and the fact he is the best father in the world. But there is a lot more to my husband than meets the eye.

My husband and I are opposites in many ways, but over the 11 years we have been together a lot of his goodness has rubbed off on me. I used to fly off the mouth at things that annoyed me. His opposite approach of tolerance amazed me from the start. Over the years I came to notice despite his opinion of people he would never gossip. He often won’t tell me what he thinks of others, only divulging his opinion once I notice a certain behaviour or attitude firsthand. I have learned over the years that his diplomatic approach is not only kind but by not engaging he diverts drama. This I like. I now strive to have a similar approach.

He has many beautiful qualities. He loves my family like his own - my Mother will never go into a nursing home as far as he is concerned. He will have way too much fun taunting her playfully in his own house! He is a fantastic father – our son has no doubt he is loved and never misses out on affection from his father. He puts us first – before his work or anything else. We are his priority, not by word but by action. He gives me ALL his money – yup, every cent. The guy didn’t even know he had a pay rise until I told him! He doesn’t want for much and appreciates the small things. He doesn’t like to spend a fortune on material things but won’t batter an eyelid when forking out on a good meal with good company. He is sensible but fun. He is level-headed and grounded.

During a very difficult time over a period of about two years he stood firm by my side. I don’t doubt I can be erratic at the best of times but during this period I was not easy to understand, even I had trouble understanding me. I don’t think he even attempted to understand me, he just stayed by my side, his arm around my shoulder. He has never, ever turned his back on me, despite bad behaviour on my part. Before you go thinking he is a pushover, don’t. He will stand up to me if I behave badly, however during times I have acted out of sadness or difficulty, he has understood.

He is messy. He always, ALWAYS fluffs around for ten minutes before he is about to leave the house, piping up with ‘Have you seen my wallet? Know where my phone is?’ and he is super grumpy, as in irrationally grumpy, when he is hungry. But he cooks a mean meal, doesn’t mind doing the laundry and loves me like no other. Friends have commented on how they love that he isn't afraid to get in and join the kids. He has donned a camo jumpsuit and gone out onto 'the battlefield' at Laser Corps, he will join in at birthday parties and play laser tag or video games, and has spent many a night playing xbox with the younger lads.

If he is willing to hang out with me for another three or four decades I will be a happy girl. I love that at the end of a long day I can come home to him. He may drive me nuts some days but I hate the thought of being apart from him. Even when we discussed the idea of him working away for a better income I chose working myself to have him close. He makes my gloomy days sunny. When it feels like the world is against me I know he is on my side. And the sight of him and our son laughing at something silly is worth more than all the money in the world.

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